Tuesday, November 18, 2008

An Open Letter

Dear Obama Supporters Hoping to Come for the Inauguration,

Hello.

I write this letter out of concern. The latest projection of how many of you fine citizens will arrive in our fair city is 1.5 million. One point five million people descending on DC. Now, it's not that I don't understand the desire to be here for the event. When Obama won, I was thrilled by the idea of being so close to history in January. But then reality set in, and I decided I better get the hell out of town. It seems as though many of the area's residents have come to the same realization, as you can see from a quick glance at Craigslist.

So, out-of-towners hoping to score housing for the 20th, stop and ask yourself, "Why are so many people from DC willing to give up this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity? Even if they voted for McCain, isn't this the kind of thing people inside the Beltway would kill to see?"

Here's the answer: because we know just how insane that weekend is going to be. It'll be like the 4th of July and every day of the Cherry Blossom festival put together, times 20. The odds of actually getting close enough to see anything are so long it's not worth giving up a warm house and a tv. I'm willing to wager that a good amount of the metro stops downtown will be closed, making the system even more hectic and confusing for novice riders. Traffic will be an absolute nightmare. Security will be worse.

My suggestion? Stay home. Take the day off work and have a party.

Yours,

M Slash

2 comments:

Anna said...

Ugh, my mother-in-law needs to see this post. She is hellbent on coming out here in January: booked a flight a few days before the election, and may or may not have actually booked a hotel room. If she has to sleep on my sofa, so help me...

danielobvt said...

As a DC native I am getting the heck out of dodge. Combined with MLK day off and getting the Inauguration day off as a federal employee, that equals a 4 day weekend. Sounds like a good time to go hit the slopes somewhere far away.