Wednesday, December 31, 2008

We were getting anxious

Christmas is not only a time to reconnect with family, but also an opportunity to introduce your relatives to any new love interests one may have. My most favorite cousin Toast found herself in this situation this year, although the fine young gentleman did not arrive until 8:30, avoiding the majority of family. By the time they got to the house, only the most die-hard family members remained, only staying to meet the new man. Now, earlier in the day one of our aunts had remarked, "You either love us or hate us. We've scared off quite a few people." This is true; we do tend to inspire feelings on either end of the scale, not the middle.

Anyway, minutes after new boyfriend entered the house, one aunt launched into a story of how she had spent hours walking around with toilet paper hanging from her pants. And then followed that with (with a prompt from me, I will admit) an assertion that Jolly Rancher gelatin has the consistency of a baby's butt. All the while reinforcing my belief that it is best to marry the person first, THEN introduce him to the family. Divorces are expensive.

All in all, not a bad introduction to the family. Just remember Toast, at least there were no fart machines around. Just wait until the beach!

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