I'm literal, people

I don't know if it's all the drugs in the DC water supply, but I've been having some strange dreams lately. I'm not the best at interpreting them, so I usually wake up confused as all hell. There've been a few featuring my parents, but I don't think it's their way of communicating with me beyond the grave, since in none of them has my father yelled at me for having both the heat and the fan on at the same time. And believe me, that would be the first thing he'd bring up. Well, that and asking if I was planning on keeping that paper from two days ago for posterity or did I not have the time to throw it out?

I think my subconscious has deduced that I'm not capable of comprehending its mysterious ways, because why am I dreaming that someone's kids are being yelled at for singing in music class? Especially when I don't even like this particular person?

Anyway, last night I was in a half-asleep stage in which I recognized that I had a headache, but was still dreaming. In one dream, I said, "I have a headache. I'm going to take some Excedrin." That apparently wasn't enough, because I then had another dream that featured the same line, repeated a couple of times. Eventually, I woke up fully and thought, "You know? Maybe I should get some Excedrin."

Of course, this was at 3:30, and I couldn't go back to sleep. Damn dreams.

WANT!

Someone appears to have recently been hired at my place of employment with the title "Solutions Architect." (No, I don't work for the government)

I wish to change my title to this immediately. I think I would be rather good at laying the blueprints for solutions while not actually solving anything.

Finally facing my Waterloo?

Jess and I saw Mamma Mia! last night, and her dream is now to go to Greece. Mine is to be in a production of Mamma Mia!.

I've had a lot of new hopes and dreams regarding work lately, but they all keep getting shot down. I can't transfer to the Paris office, I can't start an advice column for our unit's intranet page, I can't wear suede pants on the job. I like my boss and all, but his refusal to compromise on these issues has disappointed me.