Noon...you know, around 2

Ordering cheesesteaks for some coworkers for tomorrow:
"Yes, I'd like them delivered at noon, please."
"OK, ma'am, what time?"
"Noon"
"Yes, but could you give me an exact time, please?"
"...12:00"
"OK, see you then."

I was tempted to keep going, but my day is not that long.

HUGE MISCONCEPTION

I have heard two different DC residents in the last month say that their vote doesn't count because DC has no electoral vote. Where the hell is this idea coming from? Scratch that, I know the answer: those license plates that say "Taxation Without Representation". People! That just means we have no votes in the Senate or House! DC has 3 electoral votes, the same as Delaware, and your vote on Tuesday helps determine who gets them. Now, if you want to argue that your vote will not matter, that's another story. But go vote!

Let this be a warning

This is awesome

That poor white kid in the back.

Biding my time before the game

There was a conversation at work the other day concerning women whose husbands watch sports (specifically, the NFL) obsessively, refusing to miss a game during the season. I'd always thought that this was fairly common, if not the norm, because my father's reaction to leaving the house on Saturday or Sunday in the fall was usually somewhere between "bewildered" and "shocked and appalled". It wasn't until I got to college and found that none of my male friends enjoyed watching sports that I realized it's not universal behavior.

The wives in question began debating whether it is a byproduct of the internet age, with the instant access to information, the ability to track multiple games at once, and, of course, fantasy leagues bringing a new dimension to fandom. I argued that these obsessions have always existed, the only difference is that now people have more opportunities to indulge them. My dad would watch whatever game they were showing, all that mattered was that football was on. He didn't need to have a rooting interest beforehand, he just genuinely liked the game. Hell, this was a man so into horse racing that he would watch the televised results at night to see how he would have done if he had gone to the track (this was after his bookie retired).

I imagine that I would be the sports fanatic in a marriage. I just hope any future husband of mine isn't too into "doing things" on Sundays.

One more!

Recent texts from friends

"The answer is always Eddie Money. God speed."
"The world is not fair. Dance it up for me. I heart u. I may have given up my king. But I will never give up ABBA."
"Do u remember what happened to me? cuz I do not" *
"I blame the norovirus"
"YOU ARE A BABA GANOOSH"
"Lol whatev dork"
"You vixen"
"I kno like 5 people here all there weird randoms" **

* Received at 2:24 AM. On a Thursday.

** This message is cryptic at first. I believe it's meant to be read as a sort of haiku:

I kno like
5 people here all there
weird randoms

I can't watch much more

Can someone please remind Sen. McCain that the president who faced the Cuban Missile Crisis was rather young and untested himself?

WTF?

I was browsing the Halloween candy at CVS today, and I saw the most frightening product of the season: mini bottles of Vitamin Water designed to be given out to trick-or-treaters.

Listen, people, whoever gives this crap out deserves to get their house TP'd. Good lord, at least go for the pretzels!

Learn about me!

[F]oxymoron tagged me the other day to list 7 facts about myself. I'll do my best:

1. I believe I'm the only person in the world with my full name. None of the names are unique by themselves, and there are plenty of people with my first and last names, but my middle name throws a wrench into things

2. I think the best advice I ever got was, "Never go anywhere without a nail file."

3. I arrange my bookcases so that fiction is on the top shelves, nonfiction in the middle, and oversized books on the bottom

4. I could eat bacon three meals a day, every day

5. I'm 25. I have three sisters. The one closest in age to me is 54. My niece is 32.

6. I made sure to only apply to colleges with D1 men's basketball teams. Of course, I was part of the only class at Georgetown in years not to see them make the tournament.

7. It takes me 2-3 hours to drink a cup of coffee, even though I love it

I'm not going to tag anyone, but if any of my faithful readers would like to list anything, go ahead.

It's cold!

I am wearing tights today for the first time since Spring. They are new and were apparently purchased on clearance from Caldor.

I am not really one for tights.

I understand now!

This is fantastic:

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Get that man away from meeeee!

On my cousin's advice, I tried 5 Hour Energy for the first time last night.* I think it worked, as I was able to stay out until 2 after a long day. Toast and I traveled all around the metro area yesterday, ending up at a kickball party downtown. Jess almost got herself kicked out of the league, an amazing feat when you consider that she's not a member.


*Last May, he went on a 20 minute diatribe that can be summed up with 5 Hour Energy=good, 6 Hour Power=bad. He has no recollection of this.

I have a bed!

No longer must I treat my one-bedroom like a studio! I can now use ALL rooms!

I took today off for the box spring delivery (and, of course, to celebrate Peronist Loyalty Day). Now I'm off to do some shopping. And demand the release of any jailed politicians.

...Seriously?

We won a t-shirt and visor at trivia on Tuesday, one of my proudest moments, but I think my favorite part was during a music round: They played a snippet from "Ice, Ice Baby," one of us grabbed the pen to write the title, and then looked up and said, "OH, what was his name?!?"

This was made even better by the fact that she had already gotten various obscure songs and artists correct. That Vanilla will trip you up every time.

Damn straight!

Some people like Keith Olbermann for his liberal views and anger at the Bush administration. I like him for what he just said, "Major League Baseball has said they are willing to delay game 6 of the World Series - the Phillies-Rays series, I might add..."

Prove him right, guys!

In related news, I have learned that the city of Philadelphia has gotten rid of all metal trash cans in favor of mesh baskets, for fear of what its citizens will do if the team wins.

Ha-HA!

Jeopardy! tonight has proven that I'm not up on my "shires".

I had a good weekend in South Bend, except that I left my coat there, so it's a good thing it's supposed to be in the 70s and 80s this week. I won a dollar from a gentleman foolish enough to bet against me concerning knowledge of Philadelphia sports. Now, I don't claim to be a master of this subject, but he was arguing that the Phillies have only been in existence since the late 1940s AT THE EARLIEST. I immediately countered that they are one of MLB's oldest franchises, and have been around since at least the beginning of the 20th century. He refused to believe me, saying that I was thinking of the As. Apparently it's hard to believe that Philadelphia could have once had two baseball teams. Anyway, I asked if he wanted to put some money where his mouth was, as I was rather confident that I was right. After we agreed on a dollar (lame, yes, but I think someone knew he was going to lose!) I went straight to the Wikipedia entry which states the Phillies were founded in 1883. A dollar richer was I!

That was perhaps the highlight of my trip, along with the sign outside of Bob Evans that said:
"KNIFE FORKS
STARTING AT $5.99"
If you have any idea what this might mean, please enlighten me.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get ready for the Phillies to suck.

Go Flyers!

My sister sent me this item:

"Sarah Palin, in her much-ballyhooed appearance dropping the puck at the Philly Flyers' opener, was greeted by "resounding (almost deafening) boos from the Flyers crowd."

Awesomeness

Career move?

While reading about AIG canceling the "conference" they had planned for next week that included $400 a night stays at a Ritz-Carlton, I started thinking: which job would you rather have right now- their spokesperson or their PR consultant? On the one hand, you've got to spin a lot of atrocious behavior, but on the other, you've got to deal with what appears to be a company run by idiots. Who the hell would think that running an ad campaign, essentially funded by taxpayers, to justify a $440,000 spa vacation that occurred days after the government agreed to give them $85 billion could possibly be successful? I guess the same people who got the company into this mess.

And then let's go to the Ranch House

There has been some criticism of Sen. Biden for referring to a restaurant on Union Street that has been closed for 20 years. And that wasn't on Union Street. Well, I'd like to defend him, not as a Democrat, but as a Wilmingtonian.

First, that entire area is referred to as "Union Street." I guess it would technically be Little Italy, but when referring to it in conversation one would say "over by Union Street" or "near St. Anthony's."

Second, long-time residents of the city tend to refer to locations by what they used to be, in a passive-aggressive way of boasting about how long they've lived there. For example, I might tell someone that I dropped my car off for an oil change at Campanella's, next to the old Wanamaker's building. Wanamaker's closed 17 years ago. An older person might give directions that refer to the old Wilmington High on Pennsylvania Avenue. The school moved in 1960. Wilmington High doesn't even exist anymore.

My point is, was the Senator actually thinking of another restaurant? Probably. But would a native Wilmingtonian of his generation have known what he meant? I'd argue yes.

Plea for help

I have recently learned that one of my former roommates has fleas (no, not that one. Or that one). It's a new experience for him, as he's not allowed outside and has never lived with a dog or outdoor cat. Please, people, look at this poor creature and think of how he's suffering:


He is losing his hair, partly from the scratching and partly from the stress over losing his hair. Medication is on the way; it had to be special ordered and cost more than the standard, as, despite the picture above, he is into the "husky" sizes. I hear that he currently hates everyone in his immediate vicinity, a departure from his normal self, when he only hates everyone 70% of the time.

Please send him wishes for a speedy recovery!

God bless you, WGN

I wonder if my boss will allow me to renegotiate my contract so that I'm paid in gold. Or rice, beans, and condensed soup.

Anyway, I was going to go to bed early tonight, but got distracted:



Did you know that Alf went to dental school?

Yes!

If you'll allow me to indulge myself for a moment:


GO PHILLIES!

Question

This has been bothering my lately: When you go to the dentist, is it not common practice to make your next appointment while there? I've always done so, and the secretary at my current dentist even brings the appointment book into the room while I'm in the chair. In April, however, my uncle expressed astonishment that I already knew I had a dental appointment in July. My cousin has even accused me of having an affair with my dentist (he's a great guy, don't get me wrong, but not my type. And we have the same last name, so we're probably related). I've done some unscientific polling, and have gotten mixed results, so I'm just wondering.

BTW, I'm headed back in early February. In case you cared.

I want my shoes!

I ordered something from Amazon, and got an email on Thursday saying that it had shipped. There was no information from FedEx until Friday, and please look at its journey:

Date	Time	Location	Event Details
October 3, 2008	06:57:00 PM	WASHINGTON DC	Arrival Scan
October 3, 2008	07:43:00 AM	WASHINGTON DC	Shipment has left seller facility and is in transit

Even if they were delivering it on foot from the other side of the city, it shouldn't take 11 hours.

UPDATE: OH GOOD LORD:
October 4, 2008 10:53:00 AM WASHINGTON DC Arrival Scan
October 3, 2008 06:57:00 PM WASHINGTON DC Arrival Scan
October 3, 2008 07:43:00 AM WASHINGTON DC Shipment has left seller facility and is in transit

Fact-check!

Uh, Joe? While Dick Cheney has been a pretty dangerous VP, has he really been the MOST dangerous?

I think Alexander Hamilton would politely disagree.

Bad day to run out of advil

RE: Debate

My head hurts. Can anyone follow her logic?

Someone help me!

Quick question:
Why the hell has everyone from Malvern moved to DC? At least the gentleman last night looked appalled when I mentioned I've been to Maddie's.

Offended

I was in the elevator yesterday with two men, one of whom was on the elderly side, who were talking baseball. The younger one commented that at least a pitcher on his losing team won 20 games, so he'll take that silver lining. He got off first, and the older one looked at me and said, "You probably have no idea what we're talking about, do you?"

Yes.

I looked at him for a second, and said, "No, not really. I'm a Phillies fan, so I got to cheer for a winning team this year."

Seriously, let's not make assumptions in this day and age, people.

And: Go Phillies!